Английские короткие анекдоты
В разделе представлены английские шутки и анекдоты на разнообразные темы.
Teacher: Did your father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself.
Teacher: What are some products of the West Indies?
Student: I don't know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get sugar from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor.
On a crowded bus, one man noticed that another man had his eyes closed.
"What's the matter? Are you sick?" he asked.
"No, I'm okay. It's just that I hate to see old ladies standing."
If big elephants have big trunks, do small elephants have suitcases?
A: Do you want to hear a dirty joke?
B: Ok.
A: A white horse fell in the mud.
A nervous old lady on a bus was made even more nervous by the fact that the driver periodically took his arm out of the window. When she couldn't stand it any longer, she tapped him on the shoulder and whispered on his ear: "Young man... you keep both hands on the wheel... I'll tell you when it's raining!"
There is a California dude going through a desert. He's wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel and listening to music on his walkman. He's having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching.
He stops the Arabs and asks them cheerfully: "Hey, dudes, how far is the sea?"
They look at each other and say: "Two thousand miles!"
And he says: "Wow what a cool beach!!!"
In a restaurant:
Customer: Waiter, waiter! There is a frog in my soup!!!
Waiter: Sorry, sir. The fly is on vacation.
Man said to God: Why did you make women so beautiful?
God said to man: So that you will love them.
Man said to God: But why did you make them so dumb?
God said to man: So that they will love you.
Knock, knock…
"Who's there?"
"Olive."
"Olive who?"
"Olive you so much!" (I love you so much...)
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